Black Girls Rock

I just enjoyed the grad school graduation of a good friend. She now has a MA in Education and will be getting married to her long-time boyfriend this summer. She is defying all that the media says about "us." And I couldn't be prouder of her! GO GIRL!

She is in love, educated, she is independent with her own apartment and car, she doesn't have any children, has great fashion sense and is a good friend. She's everything so many people wish they could be......... She has a very strong sense of self and is dedicated and motivated to follow her beliefs. I love her. Did I mention she's a Christian? She can dance, she can sing, she can hang with the best of them. GO GIRL!

Trayvon!

Oh my heart!

Another day that George Zimmerman (or G. Killerman as my friend Wendy says) walks around free is another agonizing cry from the ancestors. If you listen quietly you may be able to hear Brother Malcolm, Brother Martin, and little brother Emmitt. ASE ASE.

As I write this I have to breathe slowly. I'm not filled with anger or rage - but the saddest calm ever. It is not a peaceful calm, but the calm of loss. The loss of a life.

Trayvon's dead body lay in a morgue for three days. His cell phone was on his person, but nobody found it worth it to look at this recent calls or address book. His body was tested for drugs and alcohol - there was none present. His confessed killer was never tested for the same.

While I will stand behind the fact that a White family would have had much more respectable treatment; this is a detriment to the human race. A life is lost and there wasn't even enough decency to make a decent effort to find out whose life it was. That is absolutely disgusting. We are failing as humans.

We, the Black collective are also failing ourselves. Did Mother Harriet risk her life on that freedom-bound train for us to piss all over it? What good is having it if we are not going to do anything with it? How many people bled, cried, and died for us to have a say? And now we have nothing to say. George Zimmerman is walking around free because of his family ties to his local justice system. From the cops straight up to the commissioner and the DA are giving preferential treatment and flaunting their ties and power all in the face of America. And they're doing it because they can!

I would challenge 5/10 of the Trayvon-supporting-hoodie-wearers to tell me who they're local ELECTED officials are. Then I want to know how many of them voted at all. We have the power to vote, we can call these officals to task on their agenda. They are supposed to do the bidding of the people. But they will only do the bidding of the VOTING populace. This case happened to get the attention of our Black President - but that is not in his job description. Had ALL the people below him done the right thing it probably wouldn't have. In the early stages however the white house deemed it as a local matter. And honestly, it was. GZ wasn't acting on behalf of an officially sanctioned body. This was a single man acting alone. However, the improper handling of the entire situation is what brought on all the attention. And thank God it did.

Let us not forget about Ramarley Graham. The kid in the Bronx who was "selling drugs" and chased by NYPD. They chased him into his home and entered without a warrant and killed him in his bathroom as his grandmother and six-year-old brother looked on. Ramarley was not only unnarmed, but no drugs were found on him or in the home either....but Ramarley deserves his own post. So I'll be back soon.

So now that the petitions have been signed, and we've marched and rallied and flooded facebook and instagram and twipicced in our hoodies, what will you do?

ARIZONA!!!???? What is on your mind.......or as we used to say back in the day, "What's on your biscuit?"

How can you really approach people and ask them for their citizenship papers? What if they aren't Mexican, what shall you say, "you fit the description?" We all know this is a law proposed to control Mexican immigration. What if it's a person born IN AMERICA of Mexican parents, are they supposed to walk with their birth certificate.

This is without a doubt one of the STUPIDEST things I've ever heard of.......

Let's thank God above that our country doesn't rest in the judgement of John McCain.

Still Untitled

I wrote this in 2008.....and felt the need to repost:


I loved you in a place where everything stood still
Where there was no reality of space a time
Where I pushed ahead and moderation didn’t exist
And only focusing on us was great and not a crime

I loved you in a place where nothing mattered at all
Where there was no reality or gravity or anything at my center
Where I pull behind me nothing and move forward with all force
And only you and I can make sense in my mind

I still love you in a place where I don’t care about anything else
Where reality ceases to exist and I only focus on you
Where I have everything and nothing and that’s all I need
And the chaotic order that haunts me is fine

N.Hop 2008

42% ?????

So, now I'm told that one of the biggest crises of the "African American" people is that we are not marrying......and if we do, we do it late......

I missed the dateline special, and forgot to DVR it. But I must say I'm disgusted at the fact that we have to see these stats day in, and day out. There are so many ways I can attack this "news"

1. When the hell did not finding a good man become a Black Women thing?

2. Why don't we pay attention to more important stats like the literacy rate of children?

3. @ "Mainstream" America....are you really dissecting the Black family as though it's not something you destroyed physically and mentally from slavery - present.......

Re #3- I often pull my brothers and sisters aside urging them not to blame "the white man" for their ills and issues. With knowledge and awareness we can overcome....it's not easy, but it can be done. However, if we really get down to the psychology of the matter the Black family is an entity that has been struggling to exist.

If we further dig into the psychology of family or marriage we know that the stats are down period in this country. Let's be real, people married in the past for safety and security. But now when women are making exponentially more money than they once did, have much more education......we don't need men the way we once did.

The successful (and to be) men and women are learning, and working.......while other women are plotting on the men. So by the time we get to the top the successful men have been preyed upon by the woman who lacks or does not desire self sufficiency.....and the successful woman has to search high and low just to settle....this is not a Black thing. This is an American thing.

Furthermore, to say a successful Black woman can't find a man, or can't get married- that's yet another stab at the Black man.....why do our imperfections have to be sensationalized and publicized? And if this is such a recognized problem, then it shouldn't sound so crazy that other races should leave the Black men for the Black women....but it does.....because this whole situation is ridiculous!

When I consider my unmarried friends, most of them want to be so. When I consider that this country has exploited Black people since our arrival on the cotton fields and now wants to point a finger like we can't get out stuff together is sickening. The Black man has long been destroyed. And the Black woman has been sexually promiscuous, angry, and now we can't find a man.........

Again, the American family dynamic period is a mess. And women period have more difficulty than men finding a "good" man. But the presentation of these "stats" is wrong, and lacking responsibility.......

I was told that a very wise man said "Never tell me the sky is the limit when there are footprints on the moon."

Good Morning all!

It's been a while......but I promise, I'm back.



This morning, upon perusing facebook I saw a friend's status message which considered outgrowing friends...... a theme which has been quite common in my head lately. And it reminded me of an idea my father posed to me years ago.

As a child, I didnt understand how my parents could introduce me to somebody and say the person "use to be my best friend." I would always ask, what happened? What could they possibly mean that somebody so close to them......is no longer close to them.


Daddy explained to me that our lives are like windy paths. Some people's paths take the same twists, turns, and dips as ours do. And those people will roll alongside you forever. Other peoples will seemingly do the same, but then for no rhyme or reason simply veer off; another person's will briefly cross. And it's okay. Accepting my dad's word as the gospel truth, as most children do, this stayed with me forever. And especially in the hardest of times losing someone to growth, and death-- I've been able to let go.

Today, I'm going to add to this idea.

There may come a time that we feel that we need to change the direction of our path, or that we need to get on somebody else's. And when that time comes- we must see where the new road is headed- and make it our own. It just may land us far from home, and it would be a travesty to want to or need to return.

That addition would have gone right in line with dad's philosophies that children are raised to go away from their parents. At this point, my father would reference birds which drop their babies out of nest if they dont fly, or perhaps a shark which will eat their young if they don't swim away fast enough. While these examples may be extreme- he is right. Parents teach and prepare children for the world, and then they are to go- to complete their growth and the cycle of life.

Undoubtedly, once one is no longer under the rule of their parents, they may want to do things differently, go different places. One may fall in love and decide to abandon or ammend their personal dreams and live in the collective. Regardless, all roads may not lead back to the starting place. It would be wise to own a change and make it your own.

Bible readers and believers may reference Proverbs 3:5-6
Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths.

Faith in God; prayer and belief in His omniscience; your path is not unclear for God is directing it.

Have a great day, and a great weekend all!!!!!!!


My father - Mr. Kevin L. Hopkins was raised in Brooklyn, NY. He has been married for over 20 years to the beautiful Joyce. He is a 20 year veteran of the MTA. He is respected by everybody he knows for his philosphies, general knowledge and confidence. He is fraternal and a natural leader. Kevin is also the current president of the Brooklyn chapter of the East Coast Bad Boyz Motorcycle Club.

It's a combination of not having enough time- and not having any motivation....this came to me on my ride to work this morning.......



I loved you in a place where everything stood still
Where there was no reality of space a time
Where I pushed ahead and moderation didn’t exist
And only focusing on us was great and not a crime

I loved you in a place where nothing mattered at all
Where there was no reality or gravity or anything at my center
Where I pull behind me nothing and move forward with all force
And only you and I can make sense in my mind

I still love you in a place where I don’t care about anything else
Where reality ceases to exist and I only focus on you
Where I have everything and nothing and that’s all I need
And the chaotic order that haunts me is fine

Black In America

Almost a week after Soledad O'Brien's BLACK IN AMERICA documentary; people are still talking. This morning on a popular morning radio talkshow a caller was outraged because he felt that the positives of being black in America were not highlighted as much as they should have been. He went on to say that with Barack Obama getting ready to become President we should leave the pain and poverty of the past behind. That idiot was invited to call the show tomorrow morning at which time there will be a scheduled discussion.

Ms. O'Brien's documentary did an excellent job of depicting the Black America that is forgotten about- primarily because of the successes of Barack Obama, Condoleezza Rice, Oprah Winfrey and other prominent Black figures. Why does America constantly forget that there are people who live in this country who are working the same jobs with the same intensity; some make $50,000 a year, and others are only grossing $14,000 a year. It's not just in Louisiana that people are too disadvantaged to flee before the storm- no matter how still the quiet.

The vast median of Black people are not politicians, investment bankers, or doctors. And when there is a deficienty of exposure it only greatens the caveat of things people don't know that they don't know. It is important to remember the past pains- and pay attention to the poverty to understand the various mindsets of the 35 million African Americans.

BLACK IN AMERICA was not illustrating a Black family that live and plays in the Upper Middle Class. It also didn't illustrate people who migrate here and by 2nd generation they are living and playing in the Upper Middle Class. BIA illustrated the average Black person in a race that only accounts for 12% of the population, but is spending over $520 million dollars annually.

Ms. O'Brien didn't go into detail about the gross brand sensitivity that exists within the Black-American culture. However, she gave a very insightful look into the lives of the people to whom (according to Nielsen) advertisers spend $805 million annually to target. Over 35% of the entire advertising and marketing costs are directed towards Black-Americans. Soledad O'Brien gave faces, and a backstory to the 12.9 million households that are contributing so heftily to the American economy.

While the idiot caller is wondering why more notable Blacks are not highlighted- he should also wonder why only 14% of Black Americans have a Bachelors Degree or higher; yet Blacks spent over $33billion on new cars.

PUNISHMENT

On the phone with my sister girl lastnite she paused to chastise her daughter.

Apparently, the almost 3-year-old stepped behind the television, where she wasn't supposed to be, and then got her legs tangled in the cords and couldn't get out. After having told the child not to go back there several times, my sister decided to leave the child back there for a couple minutes. She reminded her that she had no business back there, and told her she was going to leave there until bed time. I knew she had no intention of doing such thing, but I'm sure the child felt a range of emotions.

Babies rely on their mothers, so by mother not helping her get out of an uncomfortable and semi-chaotic spot it breaks that team notion that mom will pick up the slack every time. It causes baby to think on a more independent level and after enough incidences baby will think before acting realizing that mom may not.....or will not assist. I think this is a very important lesson.....

I am sure that when I am a mother I will do the same thing. However, when I think back to my tweens and teens these lessons were not so effective. I felt like they drove a wedge between my parents and I. Life will have so many lessons, I don't need to learn lessons at home. While I am grateful for some, I'm still not so happy with others- but it balances out.

Many of us who grew up with these types of parents (I take my hat off to all of you because it's hard to teach your kids effectively) grow up with the lesson giving mentality. We take it all through life and apply it in spheres where we should be promoting dependence and teamwork.

These lessons were to teach independence--so when your co-worker does something you don't agree with, proverbially "teaching them a lesson" draws a divide on the team. Because somebody did something you didn't agree with, is it now right to be tardy on your reports? That is consequently going to hold everybody up-and just may come back to you somehow. It will definitely lessen the motivation of the "lesson learner" to continue working with you.

When your BF/GF does something you don't agree with, why wouldn't you want to draw them closer to you as opposed to pushing them away with negative reinforcements? If you don't like that your honey told friends about an argument, why would you stop speaking to them? That's just going to push them further. And probably fuel them to tell everybody that you're being even more stubborn

If your neighbor puts their trash out to early without a can, and you now a raccoon is going to tear it up, why wouldn't u pull their can around front and help them? Realize, their trash will undeniably make the entire block look bad. So who is really learning the lesson?

Personally, I react very negatively when I realize somebody is trying to make an example out of me, or teach me something. As a child, there was nothing worse to me than my mom saying "I was going to take you (insert fun here) but you don't deserve it so I'm not." I believe that is torture. If as a mother you no longer want to sacrifice the money on taking me someplace, then don't-it's your prerogative. But why do you need to tell me? Especially if I didn't ask. Now, if I asked and was looking forward to it, that's a totally different story. And now as an adult that has carried over and magnified 200 times over. People telling me what they're not going to do because of my attitude and actions makes me so upset; it makes me not want to deal with them at all. My reactions is Who do you think you are? You are not here to to teach me a lesson!

The fact of the matter is, sometimes instead of trying to teach others, we should teach ourselves more effective ways with dealing with the issue at hand. We can learn how to avoid such problem in the future. We should verbally communicate, and not leave it to our actions.

CHOICES - Part I

It is SO amazing what can spark a thought, or jog a memory. While having a corny Hopkins moment this evening, I watched Evan Almighty with my family.....after a nice Father's Day dinner {I diced the celery :o) } As silly as the movie was, it definitely sparked some thought on asking and receiving.....from God.

God has given us free will. It would probably be a lot easier for us ALL to get into heaven if we didn't. And we all did the right thing, all the time. But that is not the world in which we live. It would make God happiest if we listened to Him, always decided according to His will, and gave Him glory in all we did. However, He still gives us an option, He still allows us to choose.

If God will give us a choice, above His own happiness, does it make sense that He will take away our choice for our own happiness? I think not!

I think back to all of the sermons and lessons that I've received that instructed me to be specific in my prayer, and not to block my blessings. I recall one in particular where my Pastor (Bishop W. Raymond Whitaker, II of Greater Free Gift Baptist Cathedral,) illustrated that if you are praying for a job, you need to be out looking for a job. And all the many songs telling that "God will make a way."

It is indeed the way that God will provide. And this rule applies across the board. When we pray for money, God is not going to wake us up to a pile of hundreds, or give us the winning lottery numbers; but He may create more overtime at our jobs, or give us an opportunity to make more money. Most people however, do not recognize the opportunity given to us. When we are praying for a new car to get to our new midnight - 6am job, we think the Crazy Eddie's radio commercial offering no down payments to low and bad credit scores are a sign from God, as opposed to offering helping that old sister from the Missionary Society who not only would allow you to use her vehicle because she doesn't go out after 8:00pm anyway; but, would also watch your kids, so if anything happened to that car, you wouldn't be rushing home because you didn't have adequate or responsible child care.

Another element that we miss is whether or not it is in God's will. If it is God's will for us to marry a certain person, we will have the opportunity to delight in such an event. If we pray for happiness, God isn't going to have us walking around smiling for no reason, but create opportunities to make us smile. Or create opportunities for us to eliminate elements in our life that impede such happiness.

God will always give us a choice. If he does not take away our choice for his own happiness, he is not going to take it away for our own. RECOGNIZING the RIGHT choice however is the key.

Stay tuned for Part II- Recognizing the Right Choice.

I love you

When I look into your eyes, I see depths that my wildest dreams cannot imagine

When I feel your heartbeat I feel a strength I cannot comprehend

Your nature has a control of me- that's visible to all

The passion that exists- the passion that flows- the fire that burns

I pray that we fan the flames forever

Star is still in the sky

Good Morning (Neighbor)

Over the last few weeks I've received numerous e-mails, texts, phone calls and comments from people wondering why I haven't had any new posts. In response, I sent out a morning message last week; however I still didn't have anything blog-worthy......

I honestly haven't had anything to share. I've been straightening some things out----- which have been the forefront of my mind. And I haven't felt moved to write about these things. I haven't really been very poetic, and way too busy for prose.

It's not my style to do things just for the sake of doing things. And I'm not going to post just for the sake of posting. I'm not going to pretend that something is more important or interesting to me than it really is. ---- So again, I am fine. I am still thinking, and as soon as the time is right I'll be back on blogspot. Until then be steadfast and diligent in your thinking, and above all else--- GET UNDERSTANDING!!!!!

Be blessed until we meet again,
Nay---L'etoil.

Premature

Man cannot survive on bread alone

Man is not meant to be alone

Numerous creations of art in numerous forms cite love, romance and their place in society. For Christians, the mere creation of Eve to keep Adam's company is enough. It is wholly accepted that people are social creatures, and everybody desires to partner off and travel through life with as a pair.

The media (not just American) plays a big role in placing a high focus and level of urgency on finding such partner that statistically, most people are partnering off prematurely; Hence, over half of American marriages end in divorce. Such number is lower than the fracturing of other partnered relations that do not even make it to the official accepted commitment of marriage.

The focus of relationships and the idea of falling in love is plaguing younger and younger people at a most alarming rate. Within the span of one generation girls were considered "fast" to be engaging in certain extra curricular activities with boys, and now girls of the same age are not only engaging in these activities but are doing so openly. This fad of pairing off is diminishing of the point of doing so. It has become pointless and effectively meaningless.

Of course, I am imparting my lifestyle, ideals, and, principles on everyone and measuring them against the Naomi's metre-stick of life.....but this is my blog (kisses).

With companionship as a given, it seems to me that unless partnering off for survival, the only other reason is for self improvement. After finding, or (for those of us who haven't yet accepted that we're ALWAYS looking) "happening" upon somebody who we (are probably first attracted to) like spending time with, we begin to evaluate other factors. Based upon our personal lists of what we will and won't deal with we either gravitate towards or away from the individual in question. So, it also seems to me, that these personal lists that we have are subjective; and some people will accept so much more than others, why do people settle?

The need to be paired off, or wanted is so great that some people will stay in an unhealthy or otherwise non-stimulating situation just to avoid not being alone. In essence, contributing to the high relationship-failure rate. Perhaps more relationships would survive if people actually waited until they found (lol, or happened upon) a person who they were more compatible (than not) with.

Certain elements such as trust, communication, and agreement are usually attributed to healthy relationships, however there are some other important ones that are overlooked. To live together, people need to be able to grow together. Growing is inevitable, and unless growing in the same direction, a couple cannot expect to remain a couple. Two people must also have a basic understanding of each other, acceptance of a person's ideas and actions are not enough, one must understand why their partner makes the choices they do to alleviate frustration and alienation. Lastly, I believe that many people overlook the fact that two people should be at similar places in their lives.

These things are very important to me. I am excited to happen upon the person who accepts me for who I am, and most importantly understands why I am. Someone who like me is not where there want to be as yet, but has a strong sense of self. Someone who I can share a transient understanding, a special element with. Whose mind and status can maintain such element which my soul recognizes as its complimentary counterpart.....the S to my N. The South to my North.

Injustice

Good Morning!

The three police officers on trial for the killing of Sean Bell were all acquitted this morning. The judge (not jury) found them not guiilty on all charges. How could unarmed men be fired at 50 times, and be at fault?

Historically, police officers are usually acquitted in cases of this kind. And this time, the racial motivation was played down because two of the three officers are Black. Why is it that White kids are never mistakenly shot? Or never have hairbrushes or cell phones mistaken for guns? Why is it that White children are referred to as teenagers and citizens, and Blacks are referred to as youth and male/female, respectively?

This is a Black/White thing; this is another example of the injustice of the justice system. This is another example of the Black community not taking social responsibility to ensure that they are treated with respect.

Sean bell (and company) may have been obeying the law, but how many young Black teenagers do not? How many times do older people not impart their knowledge and experiences on the younger generation? How often do successful people act unaffected and too far removed to make a difference?

It's no longer a matter of when is the madness going to stop? But when are those of us who can make a difference going to.

I am proud to report that as soon as I heard the verdict I promptly called my 16-year-old cousin and AGAIN reminded him about appropriate behavior with the law. That tomorrow morning after my NCNW chapter meeting I will be running a Girl Scout meeting with 11 six-eight year olds and we will AGAIN be having a meeting about current events and deciding on summertime events based on the grades they achieve in school.

I vote, I serve my community, and I am as current as current can be on events that affect my community. So I have the right to comment and challenge. I am not only my sister's, but my brother's keeper as well.

Today I leave with you a quote by Shirley Chisolm:

"Community Service is the rent we pay by getting to live on this earth"

Over and Over

Over and over
No end in sight
Over and Over
Gotta get this right



Repeat

Cycle

Circle

Repitition



This can't be right
We've got to do bette
Over and Over
Gotta get this right



Habit

Role

Rehearsal

Homo


I know where we went wrong
I see the catalyst
Over and Over
Gotta get this right


Mundane

Same

Similar

Monotonous


Over and Over
Gotta get this right
I see where we went wrong
Won't stop 'til it's tight

Untitled 3 of the Incomplete Series

You looked into my eyes and told me there was nobody else
You looked into my face and told me it was only me
My remaining question is why?
Was there nobody else because there really was nobody else?
Or was there nobody else because you only wanted me?

What seemed like perfection was not.
What I thought was perfection was far from it.
All of my proposals were rejected
My remaining question was why?
Why did you run?
Why did you alter what was there?

So much seemingly unfinished
All the emotion and experiences don't disappear
Goodbye doesn't erase time and effort
My remaining question is why?
Why isn't this but a memory yet?
Why do you stop me from moving on?

You

Months and days of fights....
HANGING UP- YELLING
Seemed things would never be right

He pulls- I push
We resist
HE WON'T COMPLY- I CAN'T TAKE IT
But I still persist

Finally-
I leave taking advantage of the peace that is at hand
But just as soon as I return and we're in each other's presence again
Who do I run into, but my one night stand

Why

Why do we limit ourselves?

Why do we contract our own possibilities?

My father once told me; "The world is your oyster; do not create a box for yourself."

Why do we predict that things won't work and not even attempt them? Are we the Oracle of this matrix? Have we never been wrong? So, why all of a sudden do we believe the frightened voice inside of us that echoes our inadequacies?

Why don't we have enough faith in ourselves to move forward and charge ahead claiming what we want; what we feel we should have. All the tools we need to conquer anything are available to us.

Why do we allow other people's views and opinions of us matter so much? These are generally people who do not contribute positively to our lives at all. Yet, one negative comment from them and we're altering our habits and routines.

After a recent conversation with a friend, I realize that even he puts too much stock in my opinions and ideas. I have my life to live, he has his, and you.....reader.....have yours. I have learned to make decisions that I can live with, and I can sleep with. Decisions that cause me to question my admission to heaven when the time comes.....and decisions that I don't feel like I have to defend......my hang ups are my own......and my passes are my own.

Be blessed.....

"Before you talk about the splinter in your neighbor's eye, remove the plank from your own." - Somewhere in the book of Matthew I believe.......

Let's talk about sex baby!

Where are the men who are not primarily concerned with sex?

Where are the men that value good conversation, fun and would prefer to get to know a female before they lay down with her?

More often than not, when describing a good date, or speaking highly about a man women (myself included) are overheard saying, "and he didn't even talk about sex," or "and he didn't even try to have sex with me." This is an epidemic of females of all ages.

Some of my male friends complain that they meet loose women, but I'm thinking that some of the women are loose because they think they have to sleep with a man to interest them. And of course, some of them are not necessarily loose, but are too discouraged to find a good man, or a man really worth their time. So in turn, they adapt the male way of thinking and begin to satisfy their carnal feelings as well. But, for a woman this is not enough, due to nature women require some form and level of care, and adulation. Man cannot live on bread alone, nor woman sex.

All parties will agree that when their is another connection at work, the physical is so much better, so why do we limit ourselves to meaningless sex? In this day and age, it is much more safe to have one partner, and with pornography so readily available anybody can perfect their skills to the professional level. So what is the thrill in multiple partners? Or the point of sex with somebody that you don't care about?

In my circle, I recently popularized the term, "embrace your 20's." And this double meaning phrase is officially used to combat all the pressure of being in serious relationships that so many people people who may not be having good luck in that department, or who are simply not ready for it feel. Instead of picking themselves apart, or searching high and low for that perfect person I encourage all to embrace their 20's. We only have them once. And hopefully we have tens of years left to get married and have children. And unofficially it is to excuse the whorish ways of many and give them an excuse.

The Bible teaches that a man is to marry one woman. And that man and woman are to have sex with each other only.......and after marriage. Not before. I am confident that most of my readers are Christian, or at least are familiar with Christian principles and teachings.....and on some level believe that pre-marital sex is wrong. So.....with that idea, perhaps we should limit some of that pre-marital sex to people we actually care about....or could see ourselves making it marital with.....

GOODNIGHT!

Nay.