Premature

Man cannot survive on bread alone

Man is not meant to be alone

Numerous creations of art in numerous forms cite love, romance and their place in society. For Christians, the mere creation of Eve to keep Adam's company is enough. It is wholly accepted that people are social creatures, and everybody desires to partner off and travel through life with as a pair.

The media (not just American) plays a big role in placing a high focus and level of urgency on finding such partner that statistically, most people are partnering off prematurely; Hence, over half of American marriages end in divorce. Such number is lower than the fracturing of other partnered relations that do not even make it to the official accepted commitment of marriage.

The focus of relationships and the idea of falling in love is plaguing younger and younger people at a most alarming rate. Within the span of one generation girls were considered "fast" to be engaging in certain extra curricular activities with boys, and now girls of the same age are not only engaging in these activities but are doing so openly. This fad of pairing off is diminishing of the point of doing so. It has become pointless and effectively meaningless.

Of course, I am imparting my lifestyle, ideals, and, principles on everyone and measuring them against the Naomi's metre-stick of life.....but this is my blog (kisses).

With companionship as a given, it seems to me that unless partnering off for survival, the only other reason is for self improvement. After finding, or (for those of us who haven't yet accepted that we're ALWAYS looking) "happening" upon somebody who we (are probably first attracted to) like spending time with, we begin to evaluate other factors. Based upon our personal lists of what we will and won't deal with we either gravitate towards or away from the individual in question. So, it also seems to me, that these personal lists that we have are subjective; and some people will accept so much more than others, why do people settle?

The need to be paired off, or wanted is so great that some people will stay in an unhealthy or otherwise non-stimulating situation just to avoid not being alone. In essence, contributing to the high relationship-failure rate. Perhaps more relationships would survive if people actually waited until they found (lol, or happened upon) a person who they were more compatible (than not) with.

Certain elements such as trust, communication, and agreement are usually attributed to healthy relationships, however there are some other important ones that are overlooked. To live together, people need to be able to grow together. Growing is inevitable, and unless growing in the same direction, a couple cannot expect to remain a couple. Two people must also have a basic understanding of each other, acceptance of a person's ideas and actions are not enough, one must understand why their partner makes the choices they do to alleviate frustration and alienation. Lastly, I believe that many people overlook the fact that two people should be at similar places in their lives.

These things are very important to me. I am excited to happen upon the person who accepts me for who I am, and most importantly understands why I am. Someone who like me is not where there want to be as yet, but has a strong sense of self. Someone who I can share a transient understanding, a special element with. Whose mind and status can maintain such element which my soul recognizes as its complimentary counterpart.....the S to my N. The South to my North.

Injustice

Good Morning!

The three police officers on trial for the killing of Sean Bell were all acquitted this morning. The judge (not jury) found them not guiilty on all charges. How could unarmed men be fired at 50 times, and be at fault?

Historically, police officers are usually acquitted in cases of this kind. And this time, the racial motivation was played down because two of the three officers are Black. Why is it that White kids are never mistakenly shot? Or never have hairbrushes or cell phones mistaken for guns? Why is it that White children are referred to as teenagers and citizens, and Blacks are referred to as youth and male/female, respectively?

This is a Black/White thing; this is another example of the injustice of the justice system. This is another example of the Black community not taking social responsibility to ensure that they are treated with respect.

Sean bell (and company) may have been obeying the law, but how many young Black teenagers do not? How many times do older people not impart their knowledge and experiences on the younger generation? How often do successful people act unaffected and too far removed to make a difference?

It's no longer a matter of when is the madness going to stop? But when are those of us who can make a difference going to.

I am proud to report that as soon as I heard the verdict I promptly called my 16-year-old cousin and AGAIN reminded him about appropriate behavior with the law. That tomorrow morning after my NCNW chapter meeting I will be running a Girl Scout meeting with 11 six-eight year olds and we will AGAIN be having a meeting about current events and deciding on summertime events based on the grades they achieve in school.

I vote, I serve my community, and I am as current as current can be on events that affect my community. So I have the right to comment and challenge. I am not only my sister's, but my brother's keeper as well.

Today I leave with you a quote by Shirley Chisolm:

"Community Service is the rent we pay by getting to live on this earth"

Over and Over

Over and over
No end in sight
Over and Over
Gotta get this right



Repeat

Cycle

Circle

Repitition



This can't be right
We've got to do bette
Over and Over
Gotta get this right



Habit

Role

Rehearsal

Homo


I know where we went wrong
I see the catalyst
Over and Over
Gotta get this right


Mundane

Same

Similar

Monotonous


Over and Over
Gotta get this right
I see where we went wrong
Won't stop 'til it's tight

Untitled 3 of the Incomplete Series

You looked into my eyes and told me there was nobody else
You looked into my face and told me it was only me
My remaining question is why?
Was there nobody else because there really was nobody else?
Or was there nobody else because you only wanted me?

What seemed like perfection was not.
What I thought was perfection was far from it.
All of my proposals were rejected
My remaining question was why?
Why did you run?
Why did you alter what was there?

So much seemingly unfinished
All the emotion and experiences don't disappear
Goodbye doesn't erase time and effort
My remaining question is why?
Why isn't this but a memory yet?
Why do you stop me from moving on?

You

Months and days of fights....
HANGING UP- YELLING
Seemed things would never be right

He pulls- I push
We resist
HE WON'T COMPLY- I CAN'T TAKE IT
But I still persist

Finally-
I leave taking advantage of the peace that is at hand
But just as soon as I return and we're in each other's presence again
Who do I run into, but my one night stand

Why

Why do we limit ourselves?

Why do we contract our own possibilities?

My father once told me; "The world is your oyster; do not create a box for yourself."

Why do we predict that things won't work and not even attempt them? Are we the Oracle of this matrix? Have we never been wrong? So, why all of a sudden do we believe the frightened voice inside of us that echoes our inadequacies?

Why don't we have enough faith in ourselves to move forward and charge ahead claiming what we want; what we feel we should have. All the tools we need to conquer anything are available to us.

Why do we allow other people's views and opinions of us matter so much? These are generally people who do not contribute positively to our lives at all. Yet, one negative comment from them and we're altering our habits and routines.

After a recent conversation with a friend, I realize that even he puts too much stock in my opinions and ideas. I have my life to live, he has his, and you.....reader.....have yours. I have learned to make decisions that I can live with, and I can sleep with. Decisions that cause me to question my admission to heaven when the time comes.....and decisions that I don't feel like I have to defend......my hang ups are my own......and my passes are my own.

Be blessed.....

"Before you talk about the splinter in your neighbor's eye, remove the plank from your own." - Somewhere in the book of Matthew I believe.......

Let's talk about sex baby!

Where are the men who are not primarily concerned with sex?

Where are the men that value good conversation, fun and would prefer to get to know a female before they lay down with her?

More often than not, when describing a good date, or speaking highly about a man women (myself included) are overheard saying, "and he didn't even talk about sex," or "and he didn't even try to have sex with me." This is an epidemic of females of all ages.

Some of my male friends complain that they meet loose women, but I'm thinking that some of the women are loose because they think they have to sleep with a man to interest them. And of course, some of them are not necessarily loose, but are too discouraged to find a good man, or a man really worth their time. So in turn, they adapt the male way of thinking and begin to satisfy their carnal feelings as well. But, for a woman this is not enough, due to nature women require some form and level of care, and adulation. Man cannot live on bread alone, nor woman sex.

All parties will agree that when their is another connection at work, the physical is so much better, so why do we limit ourselves to meaningless sex? In this day and age, it is much more safe to have one partner, and with pornography so readily available anybody can perfect their skills to the professional level. So what is the thrill in multiple partners? Or the point of sex with somebody that you don't care about?

In my circle, I recently popularized the term, "embrace your 20's." And this double meaning phrase is officially used to combat all the pressure of being in serious relationships that so many people people who may not be having good luck in that department, or who are simply not ready for it feel. Instead of picking themselves apart, or searching high and low for that perfect person I encourage all to embrace their 20's. We only have them once. And hopefully we have tens of years left to get married and have children. And unofficially it is to excuse the whorish ways of many and give them an excuse.

The Bible teaches that a man is to marry one woman. And that man and woman are to have sex with each other only.......and after marriage. Not before. I am confident that most of my readers are Christian, or at least are familiar with Christian principles and teachings.....and on some level believe that pre-marital sex is wrong. So.....with that idea, perhaps we should limit some of that pre-marital sex to people we actually care about....or could see ourselves making it marital with.....

GOODNIGHT!

Nay.

Mc Donalds

Upon a recent meeting, I inquired of a certain gentleman's occupation. He told me that he worked in McDonalds. I believe he was shocked at my motivation to continue the conversation. Eventually he released that he is really a NYPD Officer. At which time I know he was shocked at the fact that I didn't seem impressed, nor did my conversation deviate.

As a contributing member of society I would much rather hear of able-bodied people working in fast food restaurants than collecting welfare. As a future mother, I would much rather hear of a young man working in McDonalds than selling drugs. As a woman I would rather encounter someone working in McDonalds, than an ex- or future convict. The job of a police officer, keeping peace in this city, is a necessary one and is integral to the running of the city. Police Officers have a greater responsibility to many more people than McDonalds staff members, but the truth of the matter is, somebody has got to work in McDonalds. Just as somebody has got to mop the floors of the Conde Naste building.

For our world to function everybody must play a role. For things to be significant, something has to be insignificant. But they all come together; the major and the minor to make the system work.

And something can be light on one scale, and heavy on another. In the grand societal scheme, a McDonalds job is very unimportant. But to a mother with hungry children who don't know what new clothes feel like, a job at McDonalds can mean the world. A 20 hour paycheck at minimum wage can mean the difference of a child going to bed hungry, or a full belly.

More than you can handle

God will never give you more than you can handle

God doesn't want to see His children suffer. He doesn't want us to fall behind. Anything given to us has a place and a purpose. So saying and acting as though we cannot deal with what we have, I would assume, is indicative that God is wrong and we are right.

With more knowledge and a better idea of what is going on, it is safe to say that God has the bigger picture. And since we do not we need to take life in stride. Staying in prayer and surrendering daily to the Word and will of God is the only way. We have to have the relationship with Him not to ask, but to accurately receive instruction.

Lessons may not always be immediately clear, but rest assure there is always a reason.

Be blessed!
Nay.

April 1, 2008

Fairy Tales.......
Happy Endings.......
Soul Mates.....
Pots of Gold.......
Peace on Earth
Forever Love

Are they unattainable, or simply non-existent?